Screaming girls? Seriously?

I’m not exactly a young man anymore. So what to think when I get hooted and hollered at by a carload of high school girls hanging out the windows and waving their arms? This happened just the other day.

It was almost like that scene in “The Sure Thing,” where they’re driving down the freeway and the girl pops out the window and bares her chest to the guys in the Jeep. Except in this case, there was no clothing removed, which in the end, I think, was fortunate.

If you have no idea what I’m talking about, that may be some indication of how old I am. “The Sure Thing” was, like, the first John Cusack movie ever. He was practically a child actor. It was a long time ago. It had a profound impact on me. Why “Say Anything” became the iconic Cusack film and not “The Sure Thing” is something I will never understand. Here is the young child in “The Sure Thing”:

I digress.

I mention this incident not to brag. In fact, I found it a bit alarming. The male mind is not always an easy thing to control, but I generally try to avoid letting it drift into scenarios involving me and screaming teenage girls. Better for a middle-age man to just not invite those thoughts at all.

Anyway, maybe this happened only because the girls were feeling especially good — all hopped up having just been freed from the dark halls of Sheldon High School into the brilliance of a gloriously warm and sunny Friday afternoon.

And it seems to me the hooting quieted a little as they went past and saw me from the front and realized, “omg, Emma, that dude’s, like, seriously old!” In the end, it was just funny, and I smiled most of the way home.

But there’s a lesson here. Namely: If you don’t generally do it, get your fat ass out of your car and get some exercise. It’s good for your body, and it’s good for your mind.

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